I Hate You, Don't Leave Me

"...the grass as bristly and stout as chives,
and me wondering when the ground would break,
and me wondering how anything fragile survives"
                                        --Anne Sexton

I finally figured out something about animal rescue.  You may or may not know, but there are a lot of personality conflicts in the rescue world.  I would have been the last to guess that people who spend their last pennies saving abandoned pets would let their egos dominate their rescue efforts.  Maybe it's too idealistic to assume that we could lean on each other when we fall upon hard times.

Everyone who rescues animals is wacky in some way--this includes me.  Then again, I'm an Aquarius and I gravitate toward eccentric people, especially those with a humanitarian outlook and a contrarian spirit.  The dog rescue world has shown me the best and worst in people.  I've seen the full range of human interactions--from the most selfless acts of generosity to the most reprehensible and nasty behavior.  After I find Talula a home, I need to take a step back and evaluate what I'm doing.  I'm afraid I'm becoming like some of the rescuers I detest.  I'm letting the angst of other rescuers affect me and I need to remember that it's not about us...it's about the animals.  I haven't met any other rescuers my age and I'm also the lone male in a mostly female dominated field.  I even feel dumb calling myself a "rescuer"!!! The term "rescuer" is sounding overly dramatic and heroic to me.  I'm just a dog lover who gets off my ass and helps dogs.

Anyway, it's late now but this post has gotten some stuff off of my chest.  I feel better already.  In fact, I feel like bailing out a few more dogs.  =)

Thank you for your comments and support,

Jon

Comments

[Leslie]

I've seen for myself these egos some rescuers carry with them...as though they are some sort of martyr. It would be nice if they dropped the ego, but I'm glad they are saving dogs. Are they doing it for the right reasons? I don't really care as long as a dog finds a home. Also, I think all dog owners/lovers, to some degree, are wacky. I'm sorry you're having a hard time with your work but I see, through your website, your one of the good ones. Keep up the good work fellow aquarian.

[Vedder Girl]

As my friend at plumbutt has quoted: 'Develop the mind of equilibrium. You will always be getting praise and blame, but not let either affect the poise of the mind: follow the calmness, the absence of pride' - Sutta Nipata. (www.theplubuttchronicles.typepad.com). Everyone has an idea of the "right" thing. But don't let other discourage you from what you want to do!! Some people are helping the dogs for 'selfish' reasons. I agree with Leslie, if the dogs are getting good homes -- then that is what is really important. Keep up your work!! It is important and generates tons of merit.

[puppylover]

Yes the rescue community is crazy! Once you step inside their cirle you have watch your back. What happen to just trying to find homes for animals? Who wrote the book of wrong and right when it comes to rescue. Hey maybe I will start the book great idea.
Nasty rumors, people talking shit everywhere you turn you cant even go to pound with out everyone knowing what your doing and why. If they help you with your dog they think they own you when they need help. Tit for Tat. What? It is never ending soo sad if they worked together they really could make a movment!!!

[Adam]

I was kind of worried about you there for awhile my friend.. it's good to see you can take a step back and not lose sight of the big picture.

Lookin' forward to seeing you soon!

- Adam

[Cairo]

Cool. Another dog blog. And I see you live in Orange County. Me too.

[Kath]

Just found your awesome blog. Hang in there, Jon.

Maybe you need to try another venue for helping animals? I've been a volunteer with my local Humane Society for 4.5 years. Two years as a Kennel Guide and the last 2.5 years as a Puppy Foster Mom. They have been INCREDIBLE...to me, the other volunteers as well as the animals we help.

Please consider looking for a group that will value your assistance and will thank you from the bottom of their hearts.

ps - will send you pix of my last several Fosterlings :-)

[Jon Byrd]

Hi Jon,
My name is Jon also, without the H and not short for Jonathan.
I volunteer for Atlanta Animal Rescue Friends, Inc, a non profit rescue group in Atlanta, GA. I have experienced the crazy types in dog rescue and had to go through 2 interviews just to adopt our current pet. At first, I thought they were crazy to be so thorough in the interview and they made us feel like we were being interrogated in a police station. Afterwards however, we became active in pet rescue and realized that when you foster these pets in your home for months or even years, you think of them as your own and are not willing to let them go to just anyone. That being said, there is still no reason to take a military approach to making adoptions work. I have found myself in positions where a good applicant for a pet lives in an apartment and works all day and I'm torn between making the adoption or waiting for the folks who have an estate in Buckhead with a pool and a stay at home mom. I'm not making an excuse for the fanatics, but I can see how easy it is to fall into the trap. We deal every day with people who want to give us their lifelong pets simply because they move to a new apartment that doesn't allow dogs. Our group does home visits for every adoption to ensure it is a good fit and we are in the minority. You might see us at PetSmart, but you won't leave with a dog that day. I think that by delaying the adoption process by a week, you give the adopting family time to think about it and talk themselves out of it if it's not the right fit. We will even recommend other dogs from other groups if it's right for the family.
In the end however, it's all about the pet. They didn't choose their foster group and even the worst groups can provide you with a lifelong companion. If you take some time and make contact with the other groups in your area, you'll likely find a good fit.
Take care and best wishes,

Jon

[Ashia]

I can feel your pain. I am one of the worst type of rescuers because I feel like I have to save -every- animal. Though, I remind myself I can't and so I do -what- I can.

I am your age (probably a few years younger) and it is hard seeing those who have done this so long and are older than us. Bitterness takes them over and it is a sad day.......I can only hope such things don't happen to me.

Keep going. I'll root for and support you.

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